Shut up, The Lone Ranger.

At this point, I don’t care what happens to Johnny Depp’s passion(?) project. So far, it’s been a lot of talk with no real action. Disney doesn’t want to pay the ridiculous budget that the project is asking for. That’s totally fair. When the price tag is originally over $250 million dollars, yeah, some people may have to step back and ask themselves what the hell is going on.

But they don’t want to cancel the project for a number of good reasons. Mainly, they don’t want to upset Johnny Depp. He’s a celebrity, you know? Touchy feelings. After the incredibly ridiculous success of the Pirates movies and hopes for a fifth, the last thing they want to do is say no to Depp. Add on director Gore Verbinski (who directed the first three Pirates) and Jerry Bruckheimer (who produces everything with explosions this side of Michael Bay), Disney clearly doesn’t want to burn financially successful bridges. Who would?

But let’s get back to that budget. $250 million? Come on! At one point, they looked at it, caved, and shaved off roughly four dollars. What a compromise! Good negotiating! But this thing is a western, and especially after the ginormous flop known as Cowboys & Aliens, no one’s rushing to get into bed with the wild, wild west. Then, of course, there’s it being based on a radio hero from when people used to walk thirty miles to school everyday in the snow. Things are a wee bit different now.

But Disney wants to please all the seventy year old children who stay up nights wondering if The Longer Ranger will grace the big screen. Oh boy, oh boy, will he ever ride again? Well, a decision will be made next week. Phew. News? Not really. But soon we’ll all be able to shrug this whole thing off one way or another. Lucky us.

Why is this such big news? Well, I’ll tell you why (that is my job, after all): because Jerry Bruckheimer was producing it and Johnny Depp, along with a slew of other notable actors (more on that in a bit), was set to star. Before moving on, I believe we first must focus on this duo. Jerry Bruckheimer and Johnny Depp are like Disney’s jackpot. This is the team that Disney has capitalized on for four Pirates of the Caribbean movies. And on top of that, Verbinski, the recently nixed movie’s potential director was the director of the first three Pirates movies. This producer-director-movie star trio has been Disney gold, and Disney seemed to know it too, as they were able to bring in tons of money and moviegoers to the franchise.

Well, not anymore, I guess. And what is even more surprising about this “deceased” film is that it also had a more-than-solid supporting cast. How solid? Oh well, Hollywood newcomer golden child Armie Hammer (The Social Network) was slated to play the Lone Ranger himself to Johnny Depp’s Tonto. Also on board were Tom Wilkinson (The Ghost Writer) and Ruth Wilson (Luther), while Barry Pepper (True Grit), James Badge Dale (The Departed) and Helena Bonham Carter (The King’s Speech) were all rumored to be attached. So, why did Disney jump ship?

Apparently, the undesirable boot came after Disney demanded a budget of $200 million or less, and try as the film might, they could not get the budget below the $232 million budget it was at after they dropped it from the original estimated $250 million it would take to make the film.

So there you have it. A Western, and possibly a good one too, given Johnny Depp’s insistence on focusing on Tonto rather than the Lone Ranger himself, was cut over a measly $32 million. I’d like to petition here and now to start up a collection. I mean, really, after the first $200 million, what’s another $32?

So today a couple things about Johnny Depp and his Captain Jack Sparrow character. For starters, they’ve got him in negotiations for a fifth Pirates. Clearly he’s doing something right because this character will not go away. In what is now his best known role, Depp, as you know, was the only one of the original three cast members to come back for a fourth. Well, it paid off literally. More on that in a minute.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides recently passed one billion dollars worldwide. As only the eighth film to do that (and second Pirates), it is clear Depp has the star power to carry a movie himself. Sure, Geoffrey Rush and Penelope Cruz are in it—and they are in no way ‘weak’ talent—but Depp was largely to blame for its success. And, you know what, he gets paid the big bucks to do so.

How much exactly? I would hold onto your seats. According to a close source, Depp has made roughly $350 million on the four Pirates movies. What?!?!? At this point he’s not even rich; he swims in money. I think he should start a cable channel reality series where he goes around and surprises random people handing them a million dollars for nothing. Solely because he doesn’t need it anymore. I’m not saying he’s not worth the money that they’re playing him since the franchise has made over $3.5 billion worldwide, but damn!

“You’ll never believe how much more I’m making than you, kid.” – Johnny Depp in the picture above

Some people are saying this number is inaccurate, which realistically could be true. (It has to be, right? That’s too much…?) But still no one’s revealing any other figures. At this point, why wouldn’t he make another movie? No one’s ever doubted his sincerity. No one’s ever called him a sell out. After this he can make every indie art house movie he’s ever dreamed of, but why not grab one more fat paycheck (or two more, or three more, or…)

In second place was last week’s number 1 movie ‘Super 8′ taking in $21.3M while the other new release this weekend, Jim Carrey’s ‘Mr. Popper’s Penguins’ came in 3rd place with only $18M in total. My guess is releasing a kid themed movie wasn’t the best idea during Father’s Day weekend as most fathers would rather be having a barbecue than heading to the movies. Rounding out the top 5 is ‘X-Men: First Class’ in 4th place with $11.5M and The Hangover, Part II in 5th place with $9.6M. It should also be noted that ‘The Hangover, Part II’ has made $232.7M in total since its release making it the highest grossing movie of the year so far. I guess it should come as no surprise then that the ‘The Hangover, Part III’ is already in the works.

Next weekend sees the release of two pretty big summer movies, ‘Cars 2′ and ‘Bad Teacher.’ If I had to guess I’d say ‘Cars 2′ will take the number 1 spot (family/children films always seem to win the weekend) and “Bad Teacher’ will end up with a moderate box office intake at number 3.

Take a look at the complete box office results for the top ten movies according to studio estimates on Sunday…

1. Green Lanter…$52.7M

2. Super 8…$21.3M

3. Mr. Popper’s Penguins…$18.2M

4. X-Men: First Class…$11.5M

5. The Hangover, Part II…$9.6M

6. Kung Fu Panda 2…$8.7M

7. Bridesmaids…$7.5M

8. Pirates of the Caribbean…$6.2M

9. Midnight in Paris…$5.2M

10. Judy Moody…$2.2M

Happy Father’s Day Banters!

Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, give me anything but Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. Directed by Rob Marshall (Chicago, Memoirs of a Geisha), Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is the fourth installment of the series that should have died a trilogy. Starring Johnny Depp as the iconic Jack Sparrow, Geoffrey Rush as the charismatic Barbossa, and bringing in Penelope Cruz as Sparrow’s love interest, Angelica, the latest Pirates movie is nothing but a poor excuse to make money.  Keira, where were you?

Jack Sparrow finds himself in England and is forced to team up with Barbossa, who has sold out to the monarchy, to take on Blackbeard in the search for the fountain of youth. Angelica, Sparrow’s lost love and daughter to Blackbeard (played by Ian McShane), causes a bit of a problem for Sparrow as he continues to juggle between either attacking or kissing Angelica. There is nothing more than that. The story itself is as mundane as the acting. It was very apparent that none of the cast (aside from a beautiful mermaid played by spanish actress Astrid Berges-Frisbey and religious pirate Sam Claflin) wanted any part of the film. The heart that went into the first three films is seemingly gone in this installment. I guess Depp, Rush, Cruz and McShane basically showed up for a paycheck and nothing more.

Though I can’t fault the cast that much. I mean, come on, the stars in this film are a talented a bunch as any. So what went wrong? Maybe they each read the script, knew they were contractually tied to the sequel, and had no way out.  Cruz, a person who seemed perfectly casted for the role, embodied a character less likable than Lebron James circa last Summer.  More annoying than pretty.  There was nothing redeeming about her other than her looks.  Depp seemed lost throughout the entire film, Rush felt out of place and McShane was just not intriguing at all.  I am going to say it but the chemistry that Orlando Bloom, Johnny Depp and Keira Knightly is something that was sorely missed.

Basically all of the things that made the trilogy great were not anywhere to be found here. The two pirate misfits (the angry looking little guy and the lurch-like pirate who had the eye that continued to pop out) aren’t back, no continuity in the story, the Black Pearl, the monkey from the Black Pearl, Tortuga, good ole fun, a cruel yet likable villain, an engaging villain, the royal navy on patrol, and a journey that had some serious hurdles along the way were all missing from this film.

I mostly blame the script here. The story was basically a giant piece of crap, drawn out as much as possible without a smidgen of substance. What we expect from these Summer popcorn movies is plain ole entertainment. I expect to be engaged and to have each subsequent kernel taste better than the last. Except in this film I was constantly glancing at my watch, at one point considering leaving midway. And, I NEVER do that.

The Disney people who greenlit this script should truly be ashamed of themselves. I understand that these guys are in the business of making money and wanted to throw out another Pirates movies to cash in. But there has got to be a line between making profits and producing absolute garbage. Please don’t waste your hard earned money on this film. Go see Jumping the Broom instead.

SKIP IT

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The first featurette (below) goes into depth about the new villain/antagonist role of Blackbeard, played by Ian McShane. As the featurette makes clear: Blackbeard is not a typical villain as seen in a Disney film. Instead, Blackbeard, played by Ian McShane, is characterized as “the most evil character we’ve ever given you,” by Jerry Bruckheimer, the film’s producer. This clip makes clear that the movie is unlike any of the other films in the series we have seen to date. What with the walking dead, vampire-esque mermaids, and a truly evil villain taking the form of Blackbeard, it appears as if Disney has incorporated elements of the horror film into the franchise, and for this, I am excited.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The second featurette (below) tells the viewer of the varied and multi-cultural cast the film has. Perhaps pointing to the next big things in the acting world, Rob Marshall, director of the latest Pirates of the Caribbean, has cast two relatively unknown actors in two large supporting roles– that of Sam Claflin as Philip and Astrid Berges-Frisbey as Syrena. Additionally, as the featurette makes clear, the film boasts a widely eclectic cast hailing from places such as Spain, England and Japan. It’s refreshing to see a truly mutli-national film, and especially one that appeals to such a varied audience.

Click here to view the embedded video.

If these featurettes aren’t enough to peak your interest, Banterers, perhaps the very question of what Keith Richards will do this time will suffice!

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides opens this Friday, May 20th.

This really must be the season of franchise, i.e., Scream 4, The Fast Five, Transformers: Dark of the Moon. And I’ll admit, I love watching the trailers and marketing campaigns for all blockbuster franchises, as bad as they may be. Fittingly, I jumped at the opportunity to watch the new featurette, “First Day of Filming,” for Walt Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.

It’s pretty straightforward as featurettes go– what featurette doesn’t include an opening scene of Johnny Depp arriving on set in a helicopter? Big entrances aside, this featurette gets the job done. That is, it has managed to pique my interest in another episode of a franchise that I had assumed was long gone (and rightfully so, I might add). But, after watching the featurette and the film’s trailer I’ve decided to let myself get swept away (har har) with the film’s fresh new ideas as promoted through their marketing campaign.

I would even go as far as to say the franchise has become revitalized– what with its removal of the Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom characters and instead its focus on the only relationship that really matters, the one between Johnny Depp and Geoffrey Rush. Additionally, the inclusion of the talented and beautiful Penelope Cruz may have played a significant role in my renewed interest in the franchise. And let us not forget about the promises the trailer and newly released featurette offer– the familiar swagger of Captain Jack Sparrow, fountains of youth, mermaids, and zombies (oh my!). And all this in 3D?! I would ask for nothing less from the fourth installment of a Disney mainstay.

One might even say that I’m on board (har har times two). Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is set for release on May 20th. Watch the “First Day of Filming” below:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Of Course:
Films like Transformers: Dark Side of the Moon, Captain America: The First Avenger, and Thor are all pretty much guaranteed to be blockbusters upon their respective release dates. Giving them expensive, prime time exposure is neither a risk nor will it hurt the film. If you’ve got the money to throw around…go for it?

Maybe:
This category is the one I’m most looking forward to. I can’t wait to see spots from both Super 8 and Cowboys & Aliens. These films are the ones that can really use the ad time because not everyone knows about them. But when the they say something like, “From J.J. Abrams, the guy who brought you Lost and Star Trek” or “Jon Favreau, director of Iron Man,” they will draw some people in. Also, both of those movies will have great trailers.

Pirates of the Caribbean can also use the advertisement. Johnny Depp’s back, but if he can carry this whole thing on his shoulders remains to be seen. (My guess: he’ll be fine.

Huh?!?
Rio seems like an odd choice for the cost of the ad. An animated film about birds doesn’t seem like the average Super Bowl type. The child-friendly film may not fair as well as the others. On that same note, Limitless with Bradley Cooper and Robert Deniro is a weird choice. What seems to be a psychological thriller, Limitless would probably be better off spread over a few other choice spots. It doesn’t play to the same range of people as something like Captain America. Also, it doesn’t look all that amazing.

There you have it—an insight into the films to look forward to on Super Bowl Sunday. Happy Super Bowl everyone.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The next installment of Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is set to hit theaters on May 20, 2011. Keep Johnny Depp and Geoffrey Rush and add in Penelope Cruz, and you can say Pirates 4 has quite a cast.

Disney’s latest Pirates movie has many fans chattering in anticipation.  If you asked me, I’d say it’s too much Pirates. If you asked others, they’d say they want more. Nick P just told us that there is a good chance for Pirates 5 and 6.

Anyways, fans of the Pirates movies don’t fear. In fact, be happy. Here is the latest footage from the set of the movie. Enjoy

Click here to view the embedded video.

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